Update:
the guy emailed back still didn't answer even just about the gay issue needless to say that church wont be visited by me.
I did email another episcopal church in the area and it was like the difference between night and day he actually answered my questions talked about how they had some gay couples and even some gay and lesbian singles and that they where starting an introduction class this Sunday that I am welcome to attend and I am seriously thinking of going
I'm glad you found somewhere suitable, I hope it all works out for you at the church, keep us posted if you go on Sunday. :)
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